Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Man O Lantern Stress Test

Today was my blood test and stress test for GSSI (Gatorade Sports Science Institute). GSSI is in Barrington just about 7 miles from my house. I am one of the guys who tests Gatorade. You know the commercials with the person in the lab coat next to the athlete on the treadmill sweating buckets...yeah...dat me. The scientist in the lab coat you see on the commercial is actually a real GSSI exercise physiologist too. His name is John.

Today was my physical day. Standard stuff - a stick in the arm and get some blood (I am scared to see how how my hemocrit level is - I am sooo out of shape) , blood pressure - a tad high but honestly I was a bit freaked out by today's stress test from being so out of shape. On the stress test treadmill I did just fine, perhaps hitting VT (ventilary threshold a bit sooner than most racing 39 year olds) but nothing too serious. Then the test got tough. I did exactly ONE minute more than my "age predicted" mainly because it hurt a lot. I probably still had 10-15% left but I was late for work already and I needed to get the hell out of there. I probably could have held on for one or two minutes more which would have kept me in the same ranking as an athlete so why keep going except to get my "true" running VO2 max which would suck right now.

To get the right contact points for all the cardiac leads, the nurse shaves different parts of your chest and then uses a sandpaper like tape to rough up the skin for a better contact. This is a dry shave of your chest. The paper? It feels like someone is scraping you with small grains of glass. It leaves you with an interesting pattern on your chest.

I go home to shower and head to work. If you are a guy with hair on your chest you know what is coming. Lorrie who is working from home and sees me shaving my face before jumping in the shower and says this, "You look like a man o lantern." Now...I'm not that hairy but that is pretty damn funny and we both started cracking up. "Nice sweater. Does that come in a V-neck?" I respond. We were laughing so hard we could barely breathe. Lorrie was crying she was laughing so hard. Guess you had to be there to really appreciate this...

Next big test is my bike VO2 max in a few days...I need a certain number to participate in the test. It's gonna be close as this is a "big" number.

1 comment:

  1. Didn't you see the 40-Year-Old Virgin? You just have to yell "Kelly Clarkson!!" and it's all ok.