Wednesday, September 5, 2007

High Maintenance Jamba Juice

When I complete all my workouts and hit strong times I reward myself with a trip to Jamba Juice. Lately...I've been in Jamba a lot. When I was racing and training with great consistency and strong times - it seems I was in Jamba a lot. Most drinks are simple. Protein Berry Pizazz with a anti-oxidant boost or a Orange Dream Machine with a protein and anti-oxidant boost are high on my list. Last night...and this morning...I went to Jamba only to watch the entire store fill behind me as a woman in front of me ordered these:

2 shots of wheat grass
8 lemon halves
1 jumbo carrot juice
1 grapefruit type of smoothie thing

The gal last night then proceeded to do the wheat grass shooters right at the counter as if they were tequila and do the shot, salt, suck move with the lemon. This I have never seen before and now I've seen it twice in less than 12 hours. Wouldn't a wheat grass shot taste like, well...grass? I turn away and chuckle to myself as I think, "Lady, you can have all the grass you want from my yard for a whole lot cheaper."

This morning a different lady doing it also parked sideways across a handicap spot and two parking spots because she couldn't possibly bother herself to park correctly - she's in a hurry. Then why the hell did you order such a labor intensive, long ass order? Why are you even in Jamba Juice if you are such an important diva? You're in a rush? Send out your assistant for Jamba and take your enormous white Lexus SUV driving, matching G&B wearing, 42" hips straight to the office. Since you didn't ask, yes...you do look fat in that outfit. It looks like Jennifer Aniston meets Shaquille O'Neil. BTW - I think this is the lady who tries to kill me every time I ride my bike to the office. She is always on her cell phone and either has Jamba or Starbucks in one hand and her mobile phone in the other - WHILE DRIVING AGGRESSIVELY IN TRAFFIC. Brilliant. Her SUV is bigger than my first apartment. As it is white and threatens to kill people - my cyclist friends who ride the same trial to different corporate campuses refer to her and the SUV simply as 'Moby Dick'. More on this in another post.

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